Why Evolve?

why evolve?Why evolve? For without evolution we stagnate and die out.

Our lives are not meant for standing still.

Grow.

Adapt.

Change.

Evolve.

We do not live in a stasis bubble. Nothing is the same from day to day, hour to hour. We are constantly gifted new experiences which bring us new thoughts, new perspectives and which influence us in myriad ways. Mostly.

For there are some who allow life to wash over them, for whom those experiences and learning opportunities are simply occurrences of life and not ways towards change. They do not see them as routes to understanding, or a nudge to learning, they live in (blissful?) ignorance of what could be. They remain in one moment of time and space and then the moment passes them by, leaving them behind.

However others know that to fully experience this life we have been given we should take those experiences and use them for the advantage of ourselves, others, and the world around us. Use them to adapt, grow, change, evolve. Stay relevant and vital. Create all the possibilities which allow us to expand beyond what has gone before.

Nature has perfected evolution, so who are we to deny it for ourselves? Why shouldn’t we grasp the concept and use it to create a better future, a super-improved version of us, a richer and  more fulfilled experience.

Evolution is a cycle – learn, understand, adapt – and we should never be so ignorant or arrogant as to think that we are at our full potential.

Be your catalyst for change

There's times when you need to hitch a lift, there's times when the galaxy just isn't guiding you in the right direction, there's times when all you need is the answer (yes I know the ultimate answer is 42 but there are many other questions).

Enter your email to receive your letters of evolution and become the hoopy frood* you deserve to be.

*Hoopy is defined as "a really together guy." A frood is defined as "a really amazingly together guy."

What are you saying YES to?

say yesI was writing my morning pages the other day and started a ‘saying NO to’ list. It was growing quite long when I recalled a Law of Attraction video I’d watched a few days before and remembered how it talked about focusing on what you want.

Big DOH! moment – this list I was writing was all about saying no, but according to the law of attraction the universe doesn’t know the difference it simply hears the words.

“I say NO to worry” I write, and the universe registers “worry” and so that is what it sends me.

“I say NO to lack of money” and guess what the universe sends me … plus I didn’t feel good inside, I was dwelling on all these bad things so no wonder my energy levels tanked.

I looked at my list and decided to turn it on its head. What do I want to say YES to?

I want to say YES to love.

I want to say YES to working with awesome people.

I want to say YES to feeling joy every day.

I want to say YES to having an abundance of money in my bank account.

I want to say YES to creating change for good.

I want to say YES to cake without calories (OK, that may be pushing it a little).

As soon as I started saying YES to all these wonderful things my insides fizzed with fun and happiness and – yes – joy at all the possibilities out there.

I love the idea of saying YES to the good things in life, the universe, and everything. I love the idea of telling the universe what I do want because, after all, you wouldn’t go into a restaurant and tell the waiter what you didn’t want, would you?

What are you going to say YES to today?

Be your catalyst for change

There's times when you need to hitch a lift, there's times when the galaxy just isn't guiding you in the right direction, there's times when all you need is the answer (yes I know the ultimate answer is 42 but there are many other questions).

Enter your email to receive your letters of evolution and become the hoopy frood* you deserve to be.

*Hoopy is defined as "a really together guy." A frood is defined as "a really amazingly together guy."

More to Life : Heather Craik

There’s more to life, let’s find it.

Welcome to the Path42 Podcast hosted by me – Sharon – and brought to you by the digital miracle of the world wide web.

In this episode we are continuing our discussion on the phrase ‘there’s more to life’ – what feelings and thoughts does it evoke in you?

My guest today is Heather Craik. Heather is a single Mum to a toddler and runs Designmancy – the people you call when your WordPress website isn’t quite doing its job.

Connect with Heather via the Designmancy website or through Facebook. You can also follow Heather on Instagram.

Further listening …

Happiness and Evolution

%

of our happiness level comes from our genes

%

of our happiness is accounted for by our intentional daily activities and the choices we make

%

of our happiness is due to our external circumstances

What do these percentages have to do with your evolution?

Happiness is a set of skills we can learn through practice. Research proves that happiness is possible through intentional habit changes. (research by Lyubomirsky, Sheldon, et al., 2005)

This means that YOU are in control of your happiness and therefore your evolution to the next level of your life and career. Sure, there are some instances which can’t be changed, a lot of ways life can suck, however if we retrain our brains we can achieve happiness despite what is going on around us.

happiness and evolutionYOU CONTROL YOUR EVOLUTION

How does that make you feel? Powerful or helpless? Powerful knowing that you don’t have to depend on anyone else to feel happy and grow your whole life … or helpless because you don’t feel in control and you can’t imagine being in control, and where the hell do you start with this anyway?

Or somewhere in between?

I used to feel helpless, I used to think “yeah, everything happens for a reason” but I didn’t have any control over that reason. However, the information I learned over the last few years of darkest depression allowed me to realise that I can control my life – or rather I can control how I react to it. This came from something I heard a few years back –

You cannot control what other people do, think, or say, only your reaction to it

This not only applies to people, this applies to situations and circumstances too. I’m not in the perfect place right now, I have illnesses and difficulties which I still need to deal with – however, despite all the things wrong with my life I am happy. I’m not saying I couldn’t be happier, I simply look at my life from a different perspective and feel the gratitude for everything I have.

And here’s the first thought you need to note – gratitude. Often we go around focusing on the lack of everything. “I haven’t got the new car I wanted” or “I haven’t got much money in my bank account” or “I haven’t got the perfect partner” or even “I haven’t got a clean towel”.

What you focus on is what you receive. 

We are often blind to all the beautiful things around us. It’s like looking sadly across an arid, dystopian landscape and missing the little green shoots of life poking through the grey, dusty soil. Yet if we bent down and saw one shoot we would then see another, and another, and soon our sadness would be smiles at the thought of all the wonderful life blossoming around us. We would feel joy in the now and for the future.

Keep a gratitude journal, or simply ensure you write down every day at least three things you are grateful for and why you are grateful for them. They don’t have to be big things, I always start with fresh coffee, or a warm bed to wake up in … however soon you will find that the list goes beyond three. Soon you will be seeing four or five and then fifteen and then forty-two wonderful things in your life every day. All the possibilities for joy will open up to you and you will see the opportunities rather than closing yourself off in the Box of Lack. For the thought of Lack is a human failing, there is Abundance in everything if we only look for it.

Be responsible for your thoughts, and also for your actions.

Taking responsibility is another road to happiness for me. Playing the Blame Game is a total vampire, greedily sucking the energy out of your life. Let me give you a scenario based around something which many of us who suffer from mental illness are aware of already.

Spoons : you start each day with ten spoons of energy. You can’t buy any more, you only have ten each day. How are you going to use them? Are you going to spend 4 or five spoons blaming your ex for the way your life has turned out? Are you going to waste three spoons on blaming the queue in the bank for making you late for an important meeting? Are you going to spend two spoons on blaming the weather for cancelling your day in the park?

You are? Why?

Wouldn’t it be awesome to use that energy for something fun instead? Something that actually makes your life better and moves you forward instead of being stuck. And this is where taking responsibility comes in – because we have choices and it is up to us to make the right ones for ourselves. Choosing to expend energy blaming someone or something is a choice. Your choice.

Therefore, take responsibility for your choices, accept that they were what they were. Then move on and make better ones. Once I started taking responsibility for my choices then I discovered an inner serenity (yeah I know that sounds woo) which allowed me to see the possibilities from those choices and how they led me to where I am and how living in the past doesn’t work – the past is a foreign country, they do things differently there. 

Gratitude, responsibility – both these things have enabled me to be happier and to evolve my life. The third one is the Power of Now, the way of living I read about in the book of the same name by Eckhardt Tolle. Now there’s a lot in the book I don’t necessarily get on board with however the premise as I understand it in very basic terms – that the past is done and the future is unknown, all we have is the now and if we can feel the happiness in the now then that helps us in our lives – this has allowed me to be more accepting, calmer, happier.

There are many ways in which we can retrain our brains for happiness, these are only three of the ways in which I have found mine, and through these and other methods I have begun my own evolution into the life I dream of. How can I help you find yours? 

Be your catalyst for change

There's times when you need to hitch a lift, there's times when the galaxy just isn't guiding you in the right direction, there's times when all you need is the answer (yes I know the ultimate answer is 42 but there are many other questions).

Enter your email to receive your letters of evolution and become the hoopy frood* you deserve to be.

*Hoopy is defined as "a really together guy." A frood is defined as "a really amazingly together guy."

Wishing For Our Desires

wishing for desiresWhy do we hanker after what we can’t have? Why are we wishing for desires that feel out of reach?

“We all want things we can’t have. Being a decent human being is accepting that.”
― John FowlesThe Collector

According to anthropologist Helen Fisher, levels of dopamine — the pleasure chemical in the brain — continue to rise the longer you must wait to fulfil your desire (Elite Daily).

Which actually sucks when you think about it. Who wants to wait???

When we desire that which we can’t have is it a way of our subconscious telling us we don’t want what we think we want?

For instance, you’re single yet desire someone out of reach, is that a way of our minds telling us we don’t really want or need a relationship yet? To slow down?

Is it forbidden fruit, as in when your parents say “don’t touch the drinks cabinet”? So you sneak a glass when they’re out for the evening (and then feel ill and have to try hide why).

Or your diet plan says “don’t eat that chocolate bar” so it’s immediately all we think about, crave, desire, the feel of smooth chocolate melting on your tongue … sorry, I got a bit lost there.

Or is wanting something we think is out of our reach a good thing?

Does desiring what we can’t have help you rise out of your comfort zone and chase your dreams? Does it gives us that impetus to strive harder, be better, reach higher?

My question I guess is – when do we know what we desire is good or bad for us? Where is that line drawn between wanting for the good of our soul, mind, body, and wanting because – well because we can’t have and deep inside know it will be wrong for us in the long run? How do we tell the difference?

Be your catalyst for change

There's times when you need to hitch a lift, there's times when the galaxy just isn't guiding you in the right direction, there's times when all you need is the answer (yes I know the ultimate answer is 42 but there are many other questions).

Enter your email to receive your letters of evolution and become the hoopy frood* you deserve to be.

*Hoopy is defined as "a really together guy." A frood is defined as "a really amazingly together guy."

The Importance of Purpose

importance of purpose
The importance of purpose.
You can buy a girl a gym membership but you can’t make her exercise 🙂
Not having a good, solid, meaningful purpose will make going to the gym a chore, one that you will never want to do, which you will resent – sure accountability and support all help, so does cracking a whip, but you want to go because you feel the pull of your purpose not the push of necessity.
 
What is your purpose?
 
Going to the gym could be to get fit, to be healthier, to live longer. Or it could be to compete in a race, to do a charity challenge, or simply to get out of the house. There are many purposes available, which is yours, which pulls you the strongest?
 
WHY?
 
Having a purpose is fabulous, however, understanding why you have this purpose will give it deeper meaning. Knowing that your purpose for going to the gym is to be healthier so that you can live longer and spend more time playing with your children and grandchildren gives you that extra impetus to get off your backside and go.
 
This is simply an example, an analogy, and there are lots of purposes throughout our lives as well as the BIG PURPOSE. 

Thoughts on Purpose

To me it isn’t always a “what”, as in “what do I want to achieve”, it’s also a feeling, a “how”. How do I want to feel about my life? How do I want to affect others in my life, in the wider world?

Everyone could benefit from having a purpose, a reason for being, for getting up in the morning and often we will have similar purposes. However, the “why” will depend on person, situation, abilities, circumstances.

NOTE : Depression can fuck up your purpose.

The insidious thoughts meandering around your mind and choking the worth out of your purpose.

Who’d want that?

What’s the point of you doing that?

Your purpose is stupid

Your purpose is worthless

And then there’s the kindly meant phrase “don’t be too hard on yourself” which can also detract you from your purpose. Those times when your purpose asks you to do something, to move a little, to shift outside of your comfort zone –  these are the times we often use this phrase as an excuse. Note I said “often” not “always”. Because there are times when we shouldn’t talk to ourselves the way we do, when we do need to self-soothe, when we need to treat ourselves with gentle kindness.

Yet this well-meaning phrase can be the double-edged sword. Can allow us to wallow, be lazy, stay stuck. Here’s a small kick to the backside …

Some days you have to suck it up buttercup and do *that thing*, deny the excuses, live your purpose.

It’s a fine line between self-soothe and self-excuse and the only way I have found to know when to cross it (or not) is to be self-aware. Consider my motivations and reasons/excuses. Understand why I am doing or not doing. Be honest with myself. (side note : isn’t it so easy to lie to ourselves even when we never lie to others)

And this circles back to knowing my purpose, for if my purpose has depth and meaning then it becomes easier to shush the insidious voices. It may not be an immediate result, it may take a day or so even, yet it does and will happen –

for my purpose is strong and depression has no power over me!

And your purpose does not have to be a BIG PURPOSE, and often what we humans see as a small thing will have the biggest impact.

To make people smile is a worthwhile purpose.

I am a great believer in the Ripple Effect. That the small actions we take daily ripple across our lives and others to create waves of meaning and importance. So even if you feel you can’t “make a difference”, then make someone smile, do that every day, help someone feel better about themselves and watch the ripples outwards from that one small action.

Spend some time now, or soon at the very latest, considering your purpose, considering your reason to get up in the morning, understanding why you desire and feel this. And then figure out ways to achieve it.

My purpose? My purpose is to be a catalyst for change by using my experience and knowledge to stimulate change in others and in the world around me. A change to create a better world for everyone and everything. Why? Because I feel deeply that we are not here to simply exist but to constantly evolve not only ourselves, but the world around us, into better and better versions in order to improve life, the universe, and everything. 

Be your catalyst for change

There's times when you need to hitch a lift, there's times when the galaxy just isn't guiding you in the right direction, there's times when all you need is the answer (yes I know the ultimate answer is 42 but there are many other questions).

Enter your email to receive your letters of evolution and become the hoopy frood* you deserve to be.

*Hoopy is defined as "a really together guy." A frood is defined as "a really amazingly together guy."